![]() ![]() I would literally have no clue where he was, if something bad happened to him, etc. He would not respond to my texts or calls for days, even if we had plans. It made me feel pretty bad - like I was being used for just some easy affection and that's that. It started with him coming over only late during the nights, and leaving early in the mornings. And don't take me wrong: I know what it's like to be busy, and one of the reasons why I liked him so much, was because we respected each other's autonomy and freedom. We started spending less and less quality time together. Even though our relationship was still relatively new, it wasn't going that great between us. I had no idea that he was a compulsive liar at that time. They have a hard time differentiating between their lies and the actual truth, or controlling the lying in general. For compulsive liars, their lives are based around telling lies and making you believe them. A compulsive liar lies because it is their habit. Compulsive lying usually does not serve any goal or benefit. When it comes to this type of lying, there's always a reason behind the lie ánd a benefit we gain from doing so. We lie because we are embarassed of the truth, to make ourselves feel better or because we do not trust the person we talk to. I wanted to use this intermezzo to describe what I know now about him, and compulsive liars in general.Įveryone lies once in a while. It's the things that I discovered later that carry the heaviest weight. This story is not made to be told in the ordinary order of time. I cannot tell this story in chronological order, without telling you what I know now. It's hard for me to write this following part without being the omniscient narrator of my own story. ![]() He was the type of person that was happy if I was happy. He was the type of person that knew what I wanted even if I did not ask for it. He was the type of person that would always say yes if I had a crazy idea. His constant support and easy, flexible attitude made me grow fonder and fonder of him. This made me feel comfortable with him, because at that time I was really seeking acknowledgement for the hard work I was putting into something a lot of people were sceptical about. We had a deep understanding and respect for each others professional goals. It seemed like we had many things in common, especially when it came to our ambition and work ethic. I felt like he was more mature than any other guy I dated before him. Our first date was a success, so more dates followed. I remember being a bit stand-offish, but his honest answers made me feel more comfortable. Although he had a certain shyness surrounding him, he was quite open about the personal questions I asked. He bought me a frozen yoghurt with strawberries and chocolate, and we talked for a long time about our life's histories on a park bench. It was one of the first warm days of Summer. For a person that always wants to be right, I've never wanted to be wrong so badly in my life. It's not even something you consider when you fall out of love either. It's not something you consider as a possibility when you fall in love with someone. It took me a long time to realize what I actually went through. ![]() The reason why I had to break up with him, was because he happened to be a compulsive liar. ![]() Exactly one year ago from now, I broke up with the person I was in love with. Why did this happen to me? How did I allow a person like that into my life, let alone so close to me? Doesn't this only exist in the movies? I still remember everything, and especially how it felt. Exactly one year ago from today, that way was leading me to the point of questioning my whole existence. A way different than expected a way leading to other destinations than planned. Surrounded by dusty pink pillows and fairy lights, I stare out of the floor-to-ceiling window of my new apartment in Washington DC. ![]()
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